you are not ready

we have come together for nearly 2 years
and i supposed our relationship is stable
of course a little of fight is unavoidable

well
i personally think that i have blend in well in his world
but concerning my world...
it is yet to be introduced to him

# reason no.1

i am brought up in a big family
my family alone have 7 members includes me
i some more have grandparents for both my father and mother side
and many more relatives,cousins and aunties that concern about me a lot
main point of it is my relationship with all of them are close
at least we can hang out,or maybe sit down for a chat without my parents companion

now can you imagine how good i can interact with them?
and how much attention will these people put on me?
okay
maybe you can't imagine
nevermind

back to my family background
we very rare will bring our friend home
the one that is introduced to the family members will be very likely to join our family
meaning say that only to the point when they want to get married then they will bring their friend home
therefore i am very afraid to talk about boy-girl relationship in front of my family
because i can't be sure the one i brought home will definitely be my partner for the rest of my life
*disclaimer - life is full of uncertainty and nobody will be sure about future
another reason is...
there are so many of them,and they are already setting all kind of standard for my partner
even though they have not met him,or i guess it does not matter whether i got one or not
haih...

# reason no.2

another part of my world is my religion
i wonder did he ever get curious about that
he never wanted to go church
actually i do feel a bit unhappy on this issue because he seems like he has no intention to know me deeper
no matter what reason is it
i understand this is a very sensitive topic and i don't blame him for not being interested
however, my mum is putting pressure on me that i should get a christian husband
i agree with that not because of my mum requested
but because i see couples with different religion have never ending argument in between them and their family
so i insisted my husband must be a christian

# reason no.3

honestly speaking...
i found that both him and me has a very firm stand
he has his principle and belief and so do i
i have a feeling of he will not compromise
what can i do?
one of us will have to give in some day
or else we have no choice but to take different path
what if he refuse to be a christian?
what if he fail my basic expectation?

and that's one of the main reason i dare not show him my world
i am afraid that he will responded like the way i wish he will not do
i am just unable to take that risk