1st fight

after 4 months and 3 days
here comes our first fight

my bad habit of sleeping late is the cause
in fact
i did tried to kick away this bad habit

since it has been rooted in me for so long
its not easy to make a change out of a sudden
and i have no idea why its becoming worst recently

is insomnia spreading widely and i'm the unfortunate one who got infected?
or because i have been drinking too much of tea?

i finally pissed him off
i even 'idoit'ly thought that all of this is not my fault
i didn't realized the hurting that i have given
i'm just too self-centered

this is one of the very rare first time
i'm so afraid to lose someone
and he has become so important that i cant afford to lose

i'm now chilling alone under the starry night
thinking what should i do and what can i do to save this relationship
we both are simply to weak to receive any hurt
we are also to egoistic to give way, to compromise, to retrieve
this is really no good for people with similar character

i knew his life wasn't so favoring these days
i knew things are not going very smoothly for him
therefore i do not want to burden him
however
i'm not good in fixing problem
i only will mess things off
haih~
other than sighing
i don't know what else can help

i hope that he will not leave me
at least not so soon